Instrument Survey- take it!

If you've ever played a band instrument, you'll understand this survey. If not, still take it and you'll know what you SHOULD have played. It's from the magazine "Instrumentalist". I laughed my butt off!

DIRECTIONS: Read each statement below and mark it true or false.

I love being the center of attention.
(If true, you have the potential of being the first chair trumpet player)


I can't keep my hands to myself.
(If you marked this true, do NOT play percussion- the last thing you need is sticks in your hands!)

I have a problem putting 4 piece puzzles together.
(If true, you should avoid woodwinds-too many parts. Play brass where a simple twist of the mouthpiece gets you off and running.)

I love hitting things.
(Percussion is just right- it will make your day)

I have the discipline of an anteater in an ant pile.
(If true, I suggest shop classes where you can do constructive things with blowtorches.)

I love the feeling of watermelon juice dribbling down my chin.
(If so, you should play tuba, because they seem to enjoy unusual pleasures.)

I love to make funny noises.
(Trombone is the perfect instrument for you!)

I like duck hunting.
(You should play the clarinet or saxophone so you can put your mouthpiece to extra use.)

I like to whittle.
(No brainer- oboe or bassoon)

I'm a complainer.
(You can play anything! All musicians complain!)

I like living on the edge and taking chances.
(If true, play French horn)

I sometimes miss hands when I clap.
(Whatever you do, don't play percussion!)

I laugh at almost anything.
(You should play the flute or clarinet. You might end up in the front row and you'll help build the conductors self-esteem when you laugh at his/her smart-aleck asides and corny jokes)

I hate sports.
(You should play French horn or Tuba because you'll be less likely to quit and go pro.)

I love taking things apart.
(You should play percussion because you will be taking things apart and putting them back together for the rest of your musical career.)